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Chilled Out People

Traditional Chinese Medicine regards the spontaneous ability to have fun and laugh easily as a sign of good internal health. Many spiritual traditions regard a good sense of humor as a sign of innate spirituality.

These are also the ingredients of being a Chilled Out person, and the result of relaxation.

Sometimes it’s difficult to be chilled out, especially when you attend a formal event, meeting or gathering, and there’s a palpable tension in the air.

Here’s a classic example that you may be familiar with.

SCENARIO: You arrive at the event early. Everyone’s a tad stiff and awkward and you start worrying, “how will it all go, how will I go, will I be liked, appreciated, respected, seen, heard…” or whatever your insecurity or vulnerability may be at the time.

Then, someone walks in. WOW! It’s Ms. Chilled Out. 

She puts everyone at ease.

Suddenly everything you were worried about vaporizes and pretty soon you’re thinking, why was I so uptight? It’s just a few people, just like me, gathered to do x. What’s the big deal?

Now that you’ve stopped worrying and your curiosity is peaked, you gravitate towards Ms Chilled Out thinking, “She’s fun, what a great personality she has. I wonder where she’s from? AND…how come she’s so Chilled Out?” 

She laughs easily, exudes earthiness and cuts through the pomp and ceremony of social rituals with grace, humor and irreverence. She’s an interesting mix of charm, humility and self-respect. Needless to say, you are very glad to meet her. 

We’ve all met people like Ms. Chilled Out.

What could be better than MEETING her? Perhaps, BEING a little like her?


Because she’s having the best time, she’s getting the most out of the event, she gets to BE herself and feel good about herself. She’s absorbing more oxygen than anybody else in the room. Because she’s relaxed, she breathes well. Because she breathes well, she’s got energy.

You may be saying that some people are born this way. I agree this is true.

However, you can also learn to be more like Mr. or Ms. Chilled Out. It’s called developing the skill of relaxation.

Relaxation is not a bad thing to learn since it has some attractive benefits such as increased energy, improved focus and memory, better health and immunity, and reduced negative experiences. And, not to mention how positive people and things gravitate towards you…

I remember my teacher of Traditional Chinese Medicine often used to deduce the causes of many nervous disorders down to simply, the patient not having enough fun. I would ask, “why is she so stressed?”My teacher would say, “ Not enough parties, laughing and fun.” And other times, when I got too serious or overly concerned for things, he would poke me and say, “Relax! Have fun! Be silly! Sing!”

Of course, Professor also recommended creating a relaxation routine through things like Tai Chi, relaxation techniques and meditation. I practiced regularly and gradually became a much more Chilled Out person.

Start simple

There are a number of ways to develop the skill of relaxation. You can start simple with a guided relaxation technique.
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